I Hate Every Bone In Her Body But Mine

#9

I Ain't Never Gone To Bed With an Ugly Woman But I've Woke Up With a Few

#8

If The Phone Don't Ring, You'll Know It's Me

#7

I've Missed You, But My Aim's Improvin'

#6

Wouldn't Take Her To A Dogfight 'Cause I'm Scared She'd Win

#5

I'm So Miserable Without You It's Like You're Still Here

#4

My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I Miss Him

#3

She Took My Ring and Gave Me the Finger

#2

She Gets Better Lookin'  with Every Beer

And the Number One Country & Western song is...

It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chewed My Ass All Day